All Fired Up

Mr. Jackman finally wins...

2008-11-19T08:56:00.001-08:00

All we gotta say is: It's About Damn Time

Quantum of Boredom

2008-11-16T13:25:00.000-08:00

Soooooo.... we saw QoS tonight.

Hmmmmm.

STOP RIGHT HERE. IF YOU HAVE NOT SEEN THIS MOVIE, BUT WANT TO, DON'T READ ANY FURTHER. PLENTY o' SPOILERS

This movie had too much in common with Jason Bourne movies (shaky cameras. awesome fight scenes. really angry, no-personality main character) than it did with the James Bond we know and love. No cool gadgets. No suave attitude lines of dialogue (well, a couple, but Craig said them with such disdain they left a bad taste in my mouth) and just not as much FUN as Casino Royale. James Bond is supposed to be FUN. Chris said he didn't like how they made Bond so 'Angry' with Casino Royale. I didn't agree with that, but I do agree on this one. He was too serious and not "fun" enough.

And the plot was hard to follow and a bit boring/slow at times. And all Greene was after was the Water supply? Hmmm, that seemed a bit lame.

Sounds like I hated the movie. I didn't. It was well made. It just didn't feel like James Bond. I'd give it a 6.5 or 7. But I give Casino Royale a 9.5 so that's hard to live up to.

Some negatives:

Could Felix look anymore hungover and just completely depressing?
The stupid fonts used to tell us what city they were in? LAME.
The redhead Bond slept with? Hmmmm, she didn't do it for me. The way she showed up in that flimsy raincoat with nothing else on underneath? I know, I know, she's a Bond chick, but the girl Bond slept with in Casino Royale (and ended up dead in the hammock) had more taste and brains than this chick. *pukes*
All that high-tech screen stuff they used in MI6 - very "Minority Report-ish" and futuristic and DISTRACTING! They would talk about someone and sweep across 4 different screens with one flick of their finger and then POOF they were on to something else. I thought it was annoying distracting and for what? To show how futuristic their technology was? Pah

Things I did like:

1) Judi Dench. She rocks and I hope she never tires of playing M cuz Judi plays her perfectly. And they gave her a decent role. Plus the dressed her so much better this time around.

2) The way the ending played out with the hot Bond chick getting revenge on the General. When she got into the room, I thought 'Oh, great, she's gonna get in trouble with him and hesitate or something, not be able to kill him, then Bond will have to come in and 'save the day' by shooting the general' before he assaults her -- nope, she grew some balls and killed the bastard, kicking his ass royally in the process. Woot! And even though Bond had to 'save' her from the fire, it totally worked. And those 2 didn't sleep together! Strange!!!! But cool. I liked her and would have liked to see her get it on with Bond. *snicker*

3) The juxtapositioning of some of the scenes was pure genius on part of the director. The big chase scene of Bond with the MI6 traitor through the streets with the bullfighting/racing going on below? The way the murder in the opera was happening at the same time as all the members of the Quantum trying to escape? The director had some cool visions, that's for sure.

4) Daniel Craig in a tux. Even with blood on his shirt and not having slept for who knows how long. He looked amazing. As always. I just didn't like how he was so full of rage and anger. That was central to the storyline, I get that. I just didn't care for him like that. Hopefully he's let go of that a bit (as symbolized by him leaving Vesper's necklace in the snow and walking away) and he can go back to being a bit more 'fun' in the next one.

5) The way they continued the Vesper storyline. I know that's very NOT Bond, and although I just complained about him hanging on to his rage, I did like how they were realistic about Vesper actually meaning something to him. And at the end when he catches the boyfriend and he's doing the same thing to some new foreign spy? Oooooh, that was good.

7) The tip of the hat to some of the old Bond flicks, mainly with the way the redhead died on the bed all covered in Oil. Goldfinger anyone? Taylor picked up on that and loved it. LOL. SO..... all in all it just wasn't Casino Royale and I need to be OK with that.

NOTE: THe other half of our cable show producing team, Amy, hasn't seen it and won't till next weekend, so we'll see if we continue to agree on movies and what not soon enough.

Star Wars A cappella

2008-11-11T08:59:00.001-08:00

Oh come on now! You thought the treadmill guys dancing was cool? It doesn't even hold a candle to THIS GLORIOUSNESS

All the nuances and references! Let the wookiee win! Luke whining! So much talk about Star Wars stuff, we can't possibly get enough!

*sigh*

We must have them sing our yet-to-be-written All Fired Up theme show. Pat Benatar's song can serve as the melody, perhaps. Hmmmmm....

Lost Updates

2008-11-10T10:35:00.001-08:00

http://www.comingsoon.net/news/tvnews.php?id=50334

Yay! We love to see ex-24 folks back in a regular role. Especially THIS ex-24-ite. She rocked as Michelle and we were so sad to see her character get killed all unceremoniously like that. We're ecstatic that she has a 4-show-run on Lost coming up this season.

http://www.comingsoon.net/news/tvnews.php?id=50334

And a TWO hour premiere for Lost? Yipeekyyay dudes. We think our brain might just explode with information here. Let the countdown begin. Just over 2 months. Can't wait.

the half blood, the whole blood, and nothing but the prince

2008-10-28T18:14:00.000-07:00

So they released the newest trailer for HP 6 and you can see it here if you scroll down a bit.

We have to say, this looks pretty freakin sweet.

It's too bad we have to wait til the cows come home to see the whole movie. Yup. Summer 2009. TWO THOUSAND NINE, people! I remember bitching about 2002 not getting here soon enough. Yipes, we're old.

Lost S5!

2008-10-23T07:31:00.000-07:00

OHMYGOD OHMYGOD OHMYGOD THEY FINALLY PUT UP SOME CLIPS FROM SEASON 5 AND IT LOOKS SO FREAKIN GOOD I CAN'T BELIEVE WE STILL HAVE TO WAIT 3 MORE MONTHS.

OHMYGOD WHY DOES HURLEY HAVE A GUN?

OHMYGOD JACK LOOKS HOT

OHMYGOD WHAT THE FRICK IS GOING ON BUT WHO CARES ITS THE BEST SHOW IN THE HISTORY OF EVER.

http://www.comingsoon.net/news/tvnews.php?id=49920

"Where are we going, Mommy?"

"We're going on vacation, baby."

"Will we have fun?"

"No, it will be very scary. If we manage to get there alive, we'll be hunted by these mysterious strangers called Others, who kidnapped mommy and Uncle Jack once. Oh, and we'll be terrorized by a Black Smoke Monster and haunted by some scary whispers in the jungle... But there's also a beach! Maybe we'll have time to build a sandcastle before your dead ghostly REAL mommy and grandpa show up to tell us what our destiny is."

Upcoming Flicks we want to see

2008-10-18T05:29:00.000-07:00

This Bond movie looks even better than the last.

*whew*

Can't wait for it.

And Australia looks like a movie that was MADE for us. We love the Jackman. We love the Kidman. What? You put them together? And you are letting Jackman speak his native tongue? *SWOON*

The other movie that piques our interest is The Road. No trailers yet, and this is not the happiest of movies, but I'm curious how they will translate one of the best books I've ever read onto the big screen.

Bond Theme Song

2008-10-18T05:22:00.001-07:00

Does anyone REALLY like this song? Or think its worthy of being the next Bond theme song? Ok, ok, Bond songs have had some duds in the past....but this?

Ick.

It's too bad Amy Winehouse couldn't get her shit together to have created a way cooler, retro song. She's BORN to write and perform a Bond song, dontcha think? They could have asked Duffy, too. Seeing as Duffy is kinda like a blonde Amy minus the crackwhore look/feel/everything, and a little bit of Motown thrown in for good measure.

Top X-Women (no, this is not a porn blog)

2008-10-18T04:38:00.000-07:00

Wow, just figuring out how to type the title to this blog made me feel like a dirty old loser. There's no good way to label this one. It's the women of X-men. X-women? X-men women? The gals of X-men? Hmmm...

Anyway.

The lads over at Marvel have finally given us THEIR opinion on the top women in our favorite comic series. And thank the maker, they finally got most of it RIGHT. I'm not really sure why Dazzler made the list at all, but when we started to see who else should have made this list, we came up with only a few so-so answers. Mainly cuz there aren't enough TRUE mutant women in the X-men universe who have been given their due, and we assume Marvel didn't want to put 'bad guys' (oh no!) on the list. Um, but what about that slut-skank-hobag Emma? Oh yeah, she's REDEEMED Herself. Right. Gotcha. *eyeroll*

1) Lilandra - Yeah, we know. She's not really an X-Man. She's a Royal; high-and-mighty, but cool and calm, even though she has some of the god awfullest outfits ever to grace a comic book. Ok, ok, it's just the helmet, but c'mon. The helmet looks like....oh wait, that's to cover the shape of her *gulp* HAIR. Ouch. She's still a good guy in the noblest sense of the word, and anybody who can hold their own with Charles Xavier is cool with us. Should be on the list? Questionable.

2) Mystique - (wow, excuse all the typos in that link. Sheesh, Marvel, hire some proofreaders, will ya?) Here's a mutant whose popularity has soared thanks to the prominent role she played in the X-Men movies. She's never truly been an X-man, always siding with the bad guys, but she's been around enough to really show she knows how to use her powers and in a few of the alternate universes, they've given her 'good guy' status. Should be on the list? Probably not if we are looking at 'heroes' - she's anything but. Interesting and readable character? Absolutely. Honorable and Noble? Um, not so much. (But did she start a telepathic affair with Jean's husband? No. And THAT one made the list!! Harrrumpfh)

3) Sage -She's fairly a new add to the team (in comicbook-dom that is) and we're not really sure what interesting things she's done recently, but she kicked some ass in her day, and we dig the chicks with the mental powers. And hell, if DAZZLER gets on this list, as well as Jubilee? Then yeah, put Sage on here. Should be on the list? Yes.

4) Magyk/Ilyana Dont' know much about her except her main storyline involving Limbo and Belasco, but maybe she's not as popular as some of the other gals on this list. Honestly, we're not sure if she's even worthy of being 'the best' cuz what if she's a little snot or just a total dork? Wait. Jubilee made the list... Should be on the list? Questionable.

Otherwise, we are THRILLED to see the likes of Storm, Kitty Pryde, Rogue and of course the illustrious Jean Grey atop the list, and all in front of Tramp of the Universe, Emma Frost. And the fact that Jean's blurb doesn't mention Cyke at all, well that's both good and bad. Cyke and Jean were the super couple of the X-Men. Destined to be together for all time, etc, etc. But now, the writers have royally screwed that up and we couldn't agree more with the makers of this list when they say, "Sorely missed by all, fans everywhere long for the day that she will once again rise from the ashes and slap the [expletive] out of Emma Frost, commit to Logan or go her own way. Regardless, she's by far the one X-character, male or female, that can't return fast enough"

Amen to that! Cyke can go live with the slut-skank-hobag who has probably given him every STD in the telepathic way only she can. Yeah, we love to hate her all right. *pukes*

Heroes Premiere

2008-09-24T04:21:00.001-07:00

So, I watched the Heroes Season 3 Premiere. Hmmmm (This seems like the normal spot for this type of review, even though half of the AllFiredUp Cable Show That Will Never Go Anywhere *cough*Amy*cough* doesn't watch Heroes. For this post, Ms. Amy is on Assignment...)

Thought I'd post this whole big long thread....then I got sick. Then I read this:
http://tvblog.ugo.com/index.php/tvblog/more/review_heroes_season_three_premiere/

I thought, 'Um, yeah, he pretty much just said what I was thinking anyway'

So, in a nutshell:

Things I liked about the Premiere:
1) Seeing Claire as a 'bad guy' - if they can somehow make that work storywise (cuz right now they are just showing her 4 years in the future and she's tough as nails) then that would be sweet. I really do like Claire as a character.

2) William Katt and Bruce Boxleitner showing up as cameos. Perhaps Bruce will be more than that (as Poor William was iced by Jessica/Nikki/whatever her name is now)

3) The idea that Jessica/Nikki is this show's Legion. I always thought that Marvel did such a good job with the idea of Legion. A super-mutant who also suffered from multiple personality disorder. And each personality controlled a very powerful, dangerous power. And each personality was erratic and unpredictable (as opposed to erratic and predictable, Kel? ummmm....)

4) Future Peter. Dont' know why, but I like that he's in total control of his powers and seems to really know what he wants, even though once he starts down that path, he realizes he made a mistake and now has to figure out how to fix it. TRUE CONFLICT! Ok, that sounds good.

Things I didn't like:
1) Sylar is a Petrelli? Oh, come on - can we stop revealing people being related to each other at this stage? It's just for shock and drama and it's STOOPID.

2) Mohinder's COMPLETELY out-of-character turn as the Jeff Goldblum/Fly Scientist. Since when was Mohinder's motivatation based on *getting* these powers? And why would he deliberately inject something so purely untested and unverified into himself? He wouldn't. He's a Scientist first. If they wanted to give Mohinder some power (which I totally understand, cuz his storyline had run his course as the non-powered-up scientist), then make it an accident. All those Spidey/Hulk/Fantastic Four Gamma Ray-hit-me type accidents are believable. More so than just whacking us upside the head with some out-of-character stunt like this.

3) Hiro's 'adventure' - come on, can we get past the "Hiro's cute little comic-book-adventure-on-a-playground" storyline? It was cute the first season. It dragged ON and ON the 2nd season. Now it's just tiresome. Some of that dialogue is cute between him and Ando. And I like the idea of Hiro seeing Ando become 'bad' in the future and he's all concerned now. But as soon as he got accosted by The Flash's annoying bratty little sister, everything was just so *cough*stupid*cough* predictable. A friend of mine said he thought the way they potrayed Hiro was too stereotypical and it dumbed down the entire race of Asians as a whole. I am starting to agree. Hiro can remain quirky but still have some dignity. Figure that out, writers!

Overall, I think this season has potential, but it also looks like it could go the way of the shark-jumping-freaks VERY quickly. Be careful, Tim Kring. Check your flash at the door, and bring in the integrity and logic, if you please.

And for some reason, I dont' mind the folks with new powers and that they are 'cop offs' of already-known superheroes. I don't consider it a knock-off when I see someone show up with Magneto's powers, or Legion's, or whomever. As long as you keep the storylines original, I'll keep watching.

Biographies

2008-09-19T11:26:00.000-07:00

Here are the Bios that Amy and I wrote for each other - ya know, when our Cable Show That Never Will Get Off the Ground finally gets picked up.... we'll need bios, right? Right.

Kelly:
Kelly is the star of the world-wide bestseller "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire" Two Disc Deluxe Edition DVD (Legal Disclaimer: BONUS MATERIAL IS NOT RATED). Among her numerous Hollywood contacts are Daniel Radcliffe and Billy Dee Williams. She is a hardworking, modern, intelligent woman whose dream careers include the following: cable show host, Christian Bale's suit-fitter, and Director of Marvel's Continuity Department: X-Men Division. Kelly is also a selfless individual, donating her time and money to worthy causes such as cancer research and shirtless-Hugh-Jackman-cagefight advocacy. As for her political causes, she is PRO-"Jubilee kills Cyke and frames Emma for the murder" and ANTI- "Star Wars Expanded Universe."

While she could easily be considered an All-American girl, Kelly defies such simplistic definition by rejecting well-loved beverages such as beer, wine, and coffee. She is a multifaceted individual with talents and interests ranging from scrapbooking, to tattoo artistry, to George Michael worship.

Amy:
Amy is a seemingly innocent 30-something-year-old redhead whose sole ambition in life is to frame Jubilee for Cyke's murder. Well, maybe not her sole ambition. But it's right up there. She is loyal (she'd give you her newly discovered latent mutant power to you if it meant saving your life), intelligent (just ask about her pamprin-infested SAT scores!), spiritual (she prays every night to the Pagan Movie Gods that Carlos Bernard and Jack Davenport will do a movie together soon) and highly amusing when drunk. Her snarkiness roars loudly, however, at the sign of Ranch Dressing, Antonio Banderas, Kim Bauer, Emma Frost, or Locke being a dumbass.

Amy has succeeded thus far in life by not knowing exactly what it is that makes her skin crawl at the sound of the word "Muppet" but she often falls back on her ballet training to do the Lando Jig, and recently successfully negotiated the highly-popular "Put David Prowse's Likeness Into the Actual Star Wars Franchise, Mr. Lucas" petition which brought much-needed attention and money to Mr. Prowse's multitude of orphans in London's back alleys.

She never leaves the house without mascara, rarely visits the comic book store alone for fear of the pick up lines she would no doubt endure, and thinks The Twins should have been born on Dagobah. Duh.

Cleolinda, our hero

2008-09-17T11:36:00.000-07:00

At first, I thought she was just meant to be a guest on our show. Because obviously she loves and obsessess over the same things (lost, harry, 24, pirates, star wars....) but then.... well then I kept reading more and more of her blog. I've never been really addicted to someone's blog like this woman.

http://cleolinda.livejournal.com/645079.html#cutid1

That is just one of her many brilliances. Cleo, we don't want you as a guest. We want you to executive produce the whole damn thing.

And if I may add one little piece of advice - click on the 'beergnets' link. Trust me. Read it.

I haven't guffawed that hard in a very long time. Damn, she is funny.

The world does not need more Kim Bauer

2008-09-09T06:48:00.000-07:00

So Fox announced that they are stopping production of their drama, "24" to take a look at what they've got and....what? Decide their show has jumped the shark so BADLY that all the time left in the universe couldn't possibly help them? Apparently Howard Gordon thinks some re-writes or more time or the second coming could possibly help their show.

I know we're biased and pro-Tony Almeida (hell, we think THIS SITE is sheer genius, even though they are pro-Kim Bauer *blech*) but when the writers of 24 killed Tony off in the way they did.....~SIGH~ . A very moving scene for sure, but so not worthy of the heart and soul of the show (a semi-cheezy musical version of his death can be seen here). He should have gone out in a blaze of glory - defending Michelle's honor, sure, but not taken surprised by someone who was supposedly half-dead. Someone who wakes up from a coma and sticks him with a syringe of god only knows what? And the way they treated him AFTERWARDS was even more scandalous - Jack is a robot but he's not THAT much of a robot. By the next episode, Tony was all but forgotten.

So, Season 5 took that leap into shark-infested waters, and Season 6 served the buggers on shish-kebabs complete with Unbelievable Melodrama BBQ sauce.

And they recently (ok, a year ago) announced they are bringing Tony BACK from the dead because they have run out of storylines and need to appease the fans who really were still distressed he didn't get a *cough*decentdeath*cough -- silent clock.

But now - news from the High Mountain has arrived that Kim Bauer is back this season! Because YES! This show needs more drama from the Blonde Teen That Never Went To School But Became a CTU Operative Strictly Because Her Dad Was Jack Bauer. And since giving her a beau last time wasnt' enough to make us care for her, we will now give her a KID.... <>

This show used to be the best thing on television. We still applaud it for it's breakthrough format and seasons 1-4 were quite the rousing entertainment roller coaster. But it will take a WHOLE helluvalot for us to watch this season without having major eye-roll-itis hitting us every week.

~sigh~ When does Lost start up again??

Alternate Timelines/Parallel Universes, etc...

2008-08-30T16:29:00.000-07:00

For those of you novice comic book readers (or not so novice!) looking for a brush up on all the weird ways in which the Marvel writers (and DC,and... ah, heck they all do this once in a while) get away with making characters do things that are not 'normal' and/or you ever had a small shudder when you heard the term "Parallel Universe" because you thought, "Now, how does that differ from Alternate Timeline?" --- here is a rundown of the differences...Merci, Amy:

1) "OUR" WORLD: the mainstream Marvel universe (pretty self-explanatory)

2) ALTERNATE TIMELINES: These take place in our world, but involve something that "went wrong" that causes some problematic, horrific future. Major examples of alternate timelines are Days of Future Past, Age of Apocalypse, and recently Here Comes Tomorrow. In order to prevent the terrible future, someone must go back to prevent the specific incident that started the chain reaction.

- Days of Future Past: Caused when Senator Kelly was assassinated. Prevented when adult Kitty went back in time, inhabited her younger self, and stopped the assassination.

- Age of Apocalypse: Caused when Legion killed Xavier. Prevented when Bishop goes back in time to kill Legion.

- Here Comes Tomorrow: Caused when Scott left the school, leaving the students in others' hands after Jean's death. Prevented when Phoenix rewound time and telepathically "nudged" Scott to stay at the school.

Because alternate timelines cause new scenarios and relationships, certain people can be born that may not exist in our world. Examples are Rachel Summers from DFP and Nate Grey from AOA.

Obviously, alternate timelines can be affected by people from our world (see above ways that the timelines were "prevented." )

3) PARALLEL WORLDS: These are NOT our world, but rather a parallel dimension with parallel people and places, but probably unique circumstances. This is a pretty common theme in a lot of sci-fi books and TV shows. (We all have a parallel in another dimension, etc.)

Examples of this are the Mutant X parallel world, as well as the numerous parallel worlds that the Exiles visit in each issue.

A key difference between parallel worlds and alternate timelines is that nothing "went wrong" on the parallel world to make it different from ours. It simply IS different from ours in certain ways, simply by nature.

Obviously, parallel worlds can be affected by people from our world. "Our" Havok was sucked into the parallel Mutant X world and the Exiles move from dimension to dimension.

4) RE-TELLINGS: Similar to parallel world, but main difference is that a re-telling exists INDEPENDENTLY from all others. It re-tells the origins and stories of the characters, but basically keeps their personalities the same.
Technically speaking, the X-men movies and cartoons are re-tellings.
In the movies, Wolvie and Rogue are rescued by Storm and Cyke, and that's how they end up at the mansion. In the X-Men Evolution cartoon, Storm and Wolvie are adult teachers in charge of teenage Scott and Jean. Obviously, this is not how it is on "our" world, but these are re-tellings of how it all came about. In the comics, the Ultimate X-men issues are re-tellings. (For instance, Wolvie first comes to the mansion because he was sent by Magneto to kill Charles) Again, that didn't "really" happen, but that is how this particular series is presenting the character's origin.

A good way to tell the difference between a re-telling and alt timelines and/or parallel worlds is that a re-telling can NOT be affected by people from our world. It exists completely separately and independently from the mainstream Marvel universe. Polaris from "our" world is not going to be suddenly sucked into the Ultimate X-men issues any more than she would suddenly be sucked into an X-men cartoon. If she does appear in a cartoon or the movie or an issue of Ultimate X-men, she will have her own introduction. She would not just be whisked out of our world, and dropped into the re-tellings. Again, re-tellings can NOT be affected by people from our world, but alternate timelines and parallel worlds CAN and ARE affected by people from our world.

5) WHAT IF'S: These are hypothetical scenarios. They basically tell us "if this had happened, then this is what would have come after." It should be noted that some What If issues do actually take place in parallel worlds rather than just as a hypothetical situation. The issue itself will tell you whether it's hypothetical or something that occurs in a parallel world.

Jack and the Animaniacs

2008-08-21T07:46:00.000-07:00

So over the years, we've realized that we are drawn to shows/movies whose protagonist is named Jack.

You have the sadistically heroic Jack Bauer from 24

You have the even more twisted Jack Bristow from Alias

You have the I-don't-want-to-be-a-leader-although-I'm-destined-to-be-one Jack Shepherd from Lost

You have the charming Jack Davenport who played the stuffy British soldier who maybe had a heart but oh yeah, not really Commodore Norrington from Pirates, and from Coupling where he really shines as Steve Taylor.

But we have other things that we just latch on to and obsess over. We decided we're more than just fans. And we really don't act out on our obsessions (unless you call this blog an 'acting out') so we aren't stalkers, per se.

We're monomaniacs. So it was the word of the day one time on dictionary.com. Sue me.

Now...this blog really does have a point, hang on... Remember the old cartoon show Animaniacs? The goofy Wakko, Yakko and Dot and all their fun times? Sure you do. And the annoyingly lovable, completely addicting theme song they had? Sure you do.

Well, I changed up the lyrics to reflect our selfish little cable show obsessions. Get the tune in your head and sing along everybody!

(this was obviously before the Holy Trinity was renamed to the Four Horsemen thanks to Mr. Purcell. But work with me)

CHORUS 1
We're Monomaniacs
We're zany to the max
We happen to obsess
Over all people named Jack
We're Monmaniacs!

VERSE 1
There's Bristow he's the coolest
Cuz he's watchin' out for Syd
There's Bauer he's the toughest
Even though we hate his kid
There's Davenport he's dreamy, we'd totally grab him
We're Monomaniacs!

CHORUS 2
We're Monomaniacs
We're obseh-ehssed to the max
There's Jem and She-Ra, Lost and Phoenix
And Sparrow's hairy back
We're Monomaniacs!

VERSE 2
We seem to like a certain number
That would be the Three
There's trilogies and trinities
Of Star Wars and Holy
Don't mess with Carlos, Hugh, or Bale, we'll smack your l'il heiny
We're Monomaniacs!

CHORUS 3
We're Monomaniacs
We love Tony in tight slacks
Without a shirt is better, even more so from the back
We're Monomaniacs!

VERSE 3
Other things we seem to like
They go in waves but just
Give us jeans, and scruffy looks
And that will make our Lust
Match our analyzing things from Harry Potter to Dust
We're Monomaniacs!

Funny Twilight Blog

2008-08-20T08:13:00.000-07:00

http://cleolinda.livejournal.com/630150.html#cutid1">
Even if you don't or have never read the Twilight books, this blog is definitely worth checking out. This gal is F-U-N-N-Y.

Then start roaming around the rest of her site.... go ahead, you know you wanna...

And this one alone makes me think she needs to at LEAST be a guest host on our cable show, if not the Executive Producer

http://cleoland.pbwiki.com/Baby's+First+Gray+Hair

p.s. Sorry my linking capabilities aren't working now. Guess I need more exposure to harsher Gamma Rays.

Doll Alterations

2008-08-20T06:56:00.001-07:00

So my friend and I have tossed around the idea of doing a Cable TV show a la Wayne's World where we analyze and completely trash the Entertainment world as we know it. Complete with bad camera work and housed entirely in my basement (that's finished, don't worry) this could be our claim to fame in the world of YouTube-isms and people being famous for bashing Britney or jumping on treadmills for cryin out loud.

Some crazy segment ideas; hopefully you know the acronyms of the movies (Lord of The Rings, Star Wars):

We should go beyond "Doll Alterations",and have a segment every few weeks where we use our dolls to actually reenact scenes from shows or movies.

It wouldn't be as much fun for LOTR, SW, and such because those already
have action figures and playsets. But if we customize a bunch of figures
and do 24 scenes, it could be hilarious.

"OK, we've customized a Bishop action figure with dress pants and a
button-down shirt, and now he's Curtis, and he's going to have to chase
the black Barbie doll (Marianne) out into the parking lot."

"This BRATZ doll is Kim Bauer, and she's going to follow the Dukes of
Hazzard Bo Duke doll down into his bunker."

"We've removed the dress robes from the Senator Palpatine prequel action
figure, put a suit and some wire-rimmed glasses on him, and now he's Mike
Novick. Make sure he grips that cell phone accessory *really* close to
his face. Now he's going to lock the brunette Barbie (Lynn) in the supply
room playset."

Mental Four Horsemen??

2008-08-20T06:55:00.002-07:00

So Cable Show Partner and I have labeled the Four Horsemen of the male species as Hugh Jackman, Christian Bale, Dominic Purcell, and Carlos Bernard. Beautiful charming specimens who absolutely trash every other male on the planet in terms of looks, wit, movie/tv performance and in Mr. Purcell's case, a voice that can only be described as "liquid chocolate sex" - they cause us to swoon at every take, and the criteria for being inducted into the Four Horsemen is a tough one. They can NEVER look bad. Long hair, short hair, mutant hair (Jackman as Logan in X-Men), facial hair, ribs showing (Bale in The Machinist), paunch showing (Carlos in Season 4 of 24)....whatever... they ALWAYS look good. Honorable mention goes to Daniel Craig but he doesn't pull of the facial hair thing and his smile is a bit scary. Plus it used to be the Holy Trinity until Mr. Purcell came along, so if we ever do decide to induct someone else, we'll need to rename the group to represent the numerical change. (Fab Five? Too easy - we'll need to be more creative)

But we didn't want to stop there. We decided a Mental Four Horsemen might be in order. Ya know, to throw out some recognition to all those crazy writers that we think are the bomb as well. (Yeah, I just said they are the bomb - sue me)... I do believe Lindelof/Cuse from Lost should be on here, but other geniuses of the entertainment world who have proven their worth have also proceeded to go off the deep end and therein lies the rub.

For instance, no matter how awesome or horrible a movie is, if Hugh
Jackman is in it, he's still gonna be sexy. But if we're giving status to
the people behind the stories, that can change over time. Examples:

**CHRIS CLAREMONT**

20 YEARS AGO: Wow! This man is awesome! Not only is he responsible for
Days of Future Past, one of the very first alternative timeline stories in
all of comic-dom. But he's the creator of the Dark Phoenix Saga. What a
rich, epic story that still touches readers on a very personal level!

TODAY: Have aliens replaced him with a Pod Person? His current stories
are crap; he seems to not understand characters that he himself created,
and he can't even retain continuity within a single mini-series anymore!!

**GEORGE LUCAS**

20 YEARS AGO: What a genius! He conceived this epic story that touches
on good vs evil, but is so rich in characters, love, betrayal, sacrifice,
humor, etc!

TODAY: (chanting as we march outside the gates of Skywalker Ranch) "Kill
George Lucas! Kill George Lucas!"

See our dilemma?

Lost Family Tree - Org Chart

2008-08-20T06:55:00.001-07:00

Not sure if this link still works - I tried and got through once, but then couldn't again. Basically it's a little org chart of who is connected to who on Lost and how.

http://unchartedisland.wildeggplant.com/lost-chart/

Go there, try to comprehend, and come back...

This seems like a pretty sweet attempt to connct everyone.....but they are missing some stuff, I think. There is no line between Penny's dad (Widmore) and Desmond that I can see. There should be, right?

There is also no connection between Kelvin and Kate's military dad, Sam. I thought they were in the same platoon or something?

Another observation: For all the off-island people on here, there is no Cassidy, the gal that Sawyer conned and helped Kate. And had Sawyer's baby! She ties in at least 2 characters, so why isn't she on here?

And last I checked, Jack and Ana never consummated any kind of on-island realtionship....or have I blocked out some Jack-AnaLucia kissing scene? There should not be a green line from Jack to Ana Lucia. A blue line with "met at airport bar" or something, yes....

Interesting note: Sun and Jin are just kinda floating out there....they aren't connected to anyone else except themselves. Perhaps if this chartmaker knew what you found out about Sun's father's connection with Hanso....?

I see a pretty sloppy, funny cable show segment with us trying to make a much better, life size chart....One whole wall in my basement plastered with head shots of everyone, and the 2 of us tangled in red, blue and green yarn trying to tack on the connections. Dammit, Amy, where's the scissors? My red yarn is all spinning outta control!!!!!!!!!!

book titles

2008-08-20T06:54:00.001-07:00

Here are some books I'd like to check out at the library one day. If they don't exist, they should. Brush up on your seasons of 24 and other cable-show-worthy shows (x-men, star wars, Alias...)

Fun Times at Toshi Station, by Luke Skywalker

DroidMaking in the Outer Territories, by child prodigy Anakin Skywalker

Everyone Hates Me, by Halle Berry

We Don't Care, Halle, by Kelly & Amy

Loving Your Costumes Without Murdering Your Writers, By Princess Leia
(posthumous foreword by her mother, Padme Amidala)

At Least You *HAVE* Costumes, by Mystique

Smouldering 104: The Head Tilt, by Tony Almeida

Hacksaw Techniques, by Jack Bauer

Encyclopedia of Red Hair Color, by Dana Scully

Why I'm Not in More Movies, by Carlos Bernard, Guy Pearce, Michael Vartan,
Matt Damon, Gillian Anderson and Michael Biehn

Why I'm In Too Many Movies by Tom Hanks, Tommy Lee Jones, Jude Law and
Adam Sandler

My Evil Twin Has Taken Over My Body and Made Me Do These Stupid Re-Edits
by George Lucas

How To Get the Most Phlegm from Everyday Spanish - by Ramon and Hector Salazar
When Your Dad is Your Boss by Audrey Raines. Fwd by Kim Bauer

Immunity: Avoid Prosecution the B*tchy way by Nina Myers. Illustrations by Mandi the Terrorist

Disappearing Act by Behrooz Araz. Prologue by Lynn Kresge

Share Your Access Codes! by Paula Schaeffer

Telling Tall Tales to Turn on Your Boss by Michelle Dessler

Turning Chemistry On by Tony Almeida (fwd by Michelle Dessler)

Turning Chemistry Off by Sydney Bristow (fwd by Michael Vaughn)

Last Minute Sympathy by Ryan Chappelle

Strong (aka b*tchy) Black Women by Halle Berry. Foreword by Carrie
Turner and Marianne Taylor

When Ballsy goes B*tchy by Sherry Palmer

Smouldering 101 by Tony Almeida

Kissing Your Brother Is Not So Bad by Leia Skywalker-Organa-Solo

How to Go to Prison the Most Sympathetic Way Possible by Tony Almeida. Foreword by Jack Bristow.

Playing Hard to Get...At First by Michelle Dessler

When Not To Rob a House by Wolverine

Continuity Shmontinuity by Stan Lee, Chris Claremont, JJ Abrams, and
Chris Carter. Foreword by George Lucas.

Cable Show - Introduction

2008-08-20T06:48:00.000-07:00

My friend and I have decided to have a "wayne's world" type show in my basement, pathetic obssessions, rantings and all. This of course is tongue in cheek right now, but our brains are on overload anyway to fill the show with the stupidest, funniest, weirdest "segments" in order to make it a real show. The subjects will be regarding the book/movie/tv/theater world and what we are currently obsessing about at the time. Obvious topics will be: harry potter, star wars, 24, lost, hugh jackman, christian bale, carlos bernard, dominic purcell (affectionately called the four horsemen) as well as old alias, x-files, lord of the rings, and anything else we are currently "in to" including celebrity hunks we are currently lusting after.

Wanted a space to keep track of all the "ideas" for this - i'll just use this blog: may not make sense right now to anyone reading this, but it's for my benefit more than anyone else's.
--Theme song will be "All Fired Up" by Pat Benatar. Name of the show "All Fired Up" or "AFU" because we are acronym-a-holics

--Every week we'll have different segments such as:
Book titles (see following posts)

Watching certain episodes or movies, and making comments MST3K style.

Analyzing whatever in an in-depth way. Harry Potter questions, 24 questions, Lost questions - anything that is "hanging" with no concrete ending, we'll theorize it to death.

HOTM list (hunk-of-the-moment...who they are and why they deserve to be on our list)

People we hate list (need a cool acronym for this. Halle Berry, Antonio Banderas, Rosie Perez...dont' use "hate" but annoying would be more appropriate.

Famous HOTMs and the products they SHOULD be pushing (and why)

Acronym/Abbreviations List Update: SBM, FHTMA (credit to AIG site), ROTK, ESB, Voldy,

Agent Malone/Missing Persons update

Drinking games for 24 (and other shows as appropriate)

Favorite Drink (Amaretto, Mojito, where to get the best drinks PF Changs)

Four Horsemen Wannabes (and whether or not they may ever dream of qualifying)

Pagan Gods Prayer (please put Carlos Bernard and Jack Davenport in a movie together, i.e.)

Big Obnoxious Word of the Day (and using it correctly)

Dream Interpretation (Han Solo & Deo / Lucas Mafia / 24 Nina's not really dead

Poem/Rhyme tribute to one of the HOTMs or wannabes

Doll Alterations (24 style)

Obviousness-es that we feel are a GIVEN and SHOULD've Happened in our fantasy world: Twins should've been born on Dagobah; Everyone knows Tony didn't deserve prison after S3; Tony & Michelle shouldn't have BOTH died; Padme should've kicked ass in Ep3; Antonio Banderas is the devil spawn; Benicio Del Toro is our general kickaround guy for "ugliest man alive" etc etc.

Lesbian Opinoin (have susan on show)

Guest Stars!!! (best part! oh we can dream.)

Wheel of Filler (whatever we feel like to fill the last few minutes)

We can also have a ticker running across the bottom to inform the viewers of any obviousness-es we feel they should just *know* so we aren't repeating ourselves.

Call-In Segment/Q&A: When the dork from Newark calls in and tries to give us coherent examples of why Emma is such a well-devloped character, we'll give him the what for. Also, tie in to dream-analogy. Callers can tell us their weird tv/movie dreams and we'll try to interpret it for them. Need someone to screen the calls? Or do we take them blind? Could be dangerous.